Sunday, February 9, 2020
Are you lonely?
First, let me just clarify that I wasn't complaining about the warmer than usual temperatures over the last few weeks, just in case some weather gremlins happen to be reading this post. Last night was "EEEEK" degrees in wake up temperature, or -31 Celsius.. -23.8 Fahrenheit in normal people language. I'm not going out until April!
Very disappointing considering that Winter Pride was this week. I missed out on everything due to bad weather. Not that upsetting really, most things were geared towards younger people or didn't really hold a lot of interest for me. I think there is a Parade today but I have other plans so I'm not going to be there. Anyway at -31 it's not like I'm going to get to see skin, at that temperature, things could snap off!
Baby it's cold outside, this is the only moon you will get to see! Silent night, frozen night?
Are you lonely? This morning I was listening to the radio and they were talking about loneliness, a woman emailed and said she moved here six months ago and is incredibly lonely because she doesn't know anyone. I get that, to be honest I'm lonely most of the time, it's one of the reasons for being on here. It's also another reason I would like to have a boyfriend, I would enjoy the companionship.
The radio host did some research into the effects of loneliness and what she discovered shocked her. The effects of years of loneliness can be equivalent to smoking fifteen cigarettes a day, it shortens your life span, she said people who are alone and feel lonely, have a 26% higher chance of developing Alzheimer's or dementia, (that scared me). Naturally these people also have much higher chances of developing mental health issues like anxiety and depression. She said more and more people are reporting they feel extremely lonely, she also noted that it used to be mostly elderly people but that now younger and younger people are saying they feel lonely.
She then went on to talk about ways to try and combat this. That's the part I find really frustrating, people say they are lonely but don't want to spend one ounce of effort in trying to combat it. Fore example, I joined some social groups to get out more often, I felt I needed to take charge of my sparse social life. Some of the groups are LGBTQ community groups and some are not. Even though the groups may have a thousand people in them, I can't tell you how many times events have been cancelled because only three or four people signed up to go.
I think people are sitting at home waiting for the phone to ring, thinking that at any minute Brad Pitt or maybe Meghan Markle and Prince Harry are going to call "hey Mildred/Doug/Bernice, what are you doing tonight, want to hang out?" That's never going to happen so Mildred, Doug and Bernice should accept that and plan on getting together themselves for a movie night... but they won't. They will say that they are too busy but then will watch tv all evening. Other people claim to be lonely but want to argue with every point upon meeting new friends and end up driving them away. I remember my sister and her friend staying at a small boarding house for girls when they first moved to the city. There was a young woman there who complained about no one wanting to be friends with her. My sister and her friend tried to include this woman as much as possible in any social activities they did. After awhile they gave up, it was like a job trying to include her and she was completely uncompromising with activities. Some people need to realize they are isolating themselves.
Everyone is always marching around taking selfies and not wanting to meet with actual people. Nobody has time to stay connected but they have lots of time to watch hours and hours of programs on Netflix and think this is some great accomplishment. People thump their chest exclaiming they are their own best friend; however when a radio host asks if you are lonely, her switch board lights up with dozens and dozens of people saying yes, "yes I'm lonely".