Sunday, November 10, 2019
Straight guy love.
Thursday a good friend and neighbor of mine dropped in. He wanted to see how I was doing. I sometimes mention him here, he is a really nice person. I have been on a bit of a coming out roll as it were, so I thought "next"! I hate making it a big dramatic moment so it suddenly went like this. I said, "before you go I just wanted to tell you something".
It was actually funny because I heard a little voice in the back of my mind say, "oh wow are we actually doing this? Here he goes, no warning or nothing"! I went on to say, "it has to do with the reason why you never see me with a girlfriend, my sister isn't the only gay person in the family". He looked a bit confused for a second and suddenly realized what I was telling him. He said, "awww god love you Steve, that doesn't bother me, I couldn't ask for a better neighbor and friend, gay means nothing to me now, you didn't have to worry about telling me". He asked if I wanted to tell his wife in person but I didn't know when I would see her and I wasn't comfortable asking him to keep a secret from her. Instead of leaving, we talked for another two hours. He asked if he could tell his brother and sister, I said yes because I rarely see them anymore. That will however swing a door wide open, his sister is married to one of my first cousins but I'm okay with that.
This is like my second coming... out. Like many of you have said to me in the past, you spend the rest of your life coming out when you are LGBTQ. It was starting to get difficult again, different groups of people were crossing over and I thought it was better to hear it from me. I was thinking one day that I probably haven't told anyone I'm gay in almost seven or eight years.
I received a text saying that I have a friend who is behind me and treasures my friendship... from a straight guy! I could never see this day coming thirty years ago. Another straight guy text me saying that I am getting the love and respect I deserve. A little overwhelming, I didn't know straight guys could be so affectionate towards a gay man, some almost protective, it feels good. The next morning I suddenly received texts from my friend's wife, saying things like, "we support you, we have your back, you cared for others now it's your turn, be your authentic self". I had given her carrots the day before so the smartass in me text back, "wow you must have really enjoyed those carrots". Well you know me, I couldn't resist.
It's funny but over the last two months, every time I tell someone, I feel I should have done it years ago. I didn't think it mattered but somehow it does. People feel privileged when I trust them with such a personal secret and it brings us closer, I have seen people really open up to me emotionally, it's beautiful, that's the only way I can describe it, beautiful.