Friday it snowed here, not a lot but enough for the snowplow to gate me in. I was staying home that day and felt that I would deal with it later. No point in clearing the snow out only to have it shoved back in as soon as I finished. I confess I was being a slob, I wanted to do some work outside so I didn't shower, shave, comb my hair or dress up that morning. I figured I was safe, the snow bank across my lane would act as a barrier to lost tourists, sales men or unwanted visitors. The house is far from the road, so people's aversion to walking also protects me. Needless to say, I was quite startled by a knock at the door.
I was just coming up from my basement, still in my outdoor clothes and trust me, they are not "work clothes by Gap". I figured because of the snow bank, it must be one of my neighbours, they must have come in with a 4x4 (four wheel drive, for the dainty folks) and they would probably have on the same latest trend in clothing as I was wearing. As I opened the door it was every gay man's dream and nightmare all at once. There stood two young men and they couldn't possibly be more handsome than any daydream I could make up in my head, to top it off they were dressed quite well. Friendly and well spoken with warm smiles that could melt butter. I noticed a third man sitting in the van and he was just as cute. They were sent by God, to fulfill every fantasy I ever had..... actually no wait, they were sent by God or at least they thought that Jehovah wanted them to come and talk with me. Yes they were Jehovah's witnesses but I sensed that right away. Seriously and I mean seriously, where do they get these guys, from a GQ magazine? My brain is saying, "don't let them in" but another part of me is saying, " invite them in for tea, cookies, or a group shower maybe"? We don't have Mormons around here but I am told they are often cute as well. I text a friend and asked why the Catholic church never had young guys like that, maybe I would have stayed if it wasn't all blue haired old biddies that want to gripe all the time.
I didn't let them in, I just took the pamphlet and thanked them, as one guy handed me the pamphlet, I swear I saw a cute twinkle in his eye, like a handsome cartoon character in a Disney movie. They usually don't bother you after if you don't speak to them. I know a lot of people become hostile towards them but I don't, they think that they are helping you and while it's annoying, it's harmless so I don't see the point of being hateful towards them.
I told my friend I didn't let them in because the hotties are the bait, if you let them in that makes them think you are interested, then the next time they will send the recruiting professional, a troll or the big woman with the wart on her face to close the deal. I can see why there are so many gay adult movies with this theme, the young handsome man coming to the door, only to be invited in and convinced to express his repressed gay desires. Well actually I am not sure about the number of movies, I mean I heard there are some out there but I haven't watched any! The truth is I doubt there are any movies out there, where three incredibly handsome, young, well dressed men get turned on by an older disheveled, looking man in baggy clothes, smelling like a barn and they strip to begin exploring their hidden gay desires.