Tuesday, November 5, 2019
Shopping for groceries with Anderson Cooper.
Tonight while shopping for groceries, I turned the corner past the salad dressing and there he was, sharply dressed with his swimming blue blue eyes, handsome face, and white hair... it was Anderson Cooper.... well not thee Anderson Cooper but a doppelganger and not just any doppelganger... a much younger than current Anderson doppelganger. Also for me, he had the added sexiness of being a dad (dilf), with him was a mini Anderson doppelganger of about five, honestly the pair was just so adorably cute.
The guy was shopping against the flow, you know what I mean, always going around the shelves in the opposite way of everyone else. No complaints from me however, I could just look at his cuteness over and over and over. Also adding to his desirability, he was very attentive and loving towards his son, can we all just say awww.
As I was in the dairy section getting milk, Anderson 2.0 handsomely came around and proceeded to choose between different types of cheese, with a manly flair he opened the glass door and "haackcough uughhack", O.O what the ffff! Did he just hack a phlegmy open mouth cough into the coolers full of cheese? I was stunned, how can a person not realize what they just did! He's gorgeous, the cough must have crept up on him without warning, yeah that's the answer, a nice guy wouldn't do something like that. Then he opened the door to the butter, "kkhack guugh cough cough" open mouth full spray! Without meaning to do it, I said out loud, "GROSS" but nobody noticed as most people in the city ignore everything. My d i l f, just became a j e r k, what.. was this guy raised by wolves or something? He didn't even attempt to cover his mouth, just imagine what his kid is going to be like! Next he added more bacteria to the yogurt than it normally has!
I fled the area before I was surrounded by his cloud of virus. I was suddenly thankful that I bought my fruits and vegetables before he did. As I was walking down the cereal ile, I suddenly heard the hacking cough again, there he was, mouth open, checking out cereal on sale. Oh Anderson, my fantasy of you is finished, I'm never going to be able to watch you on the news again, I would become ill if you suddenly sprayed the camera lens with phlegm. Somebody's moma did a bad job.