Tuesday, April 30, 2019

Remembering.


 I have to note that it was around the last week of April, ten years ago that we learned Dad's cancer was fatal. The rest of us already knew when the doctor told him the bad news. The surgeon told my mother and sister the previous day after the biopsy, dad was still sleeping in recovery. They had to go to Montreal for the biopsy and so I stayed at the farm. I have to check back but I think we brought him home ten years ago today. It would be the beginning of a very different life for me, nothing was ever the same after that week.

 I thought of following along with the blog posts from back then as a sad anniversary of some sort. Dad's illness and death changed me and my way of thinking since that time. I decided against the idea of reliving those emotions, honestly who needs that drama, I have enough on my plate and there is certainly enough health drama with mom having dementia. Adding in more sadness isn't helpful. It's a little scary to me how often I said to people that time seemed to fly by and the next thing I know it will be ten years since his dying. In two months the ten years will have arrived.

26 comments:

Sixpence Notthewiser said...

*HUGS*

xoxo

Tio Walter said...

A hug and shoulder to lean on are the best things I can offer. I wish for better days ahead.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Yes, you lived through it once. Remember, but move on because Life waits for no one.

Deedles said...

Adding my hug to the pile.

1st Man said...

And yet another hug from across the miles! It's been my experience in life that one can never have enough hugs...

Christina said...

Here's my hug too.
Don't dwell on the past, it's gone. Xx

Old Lurker said...

It is a sad anniversary. From here it really does seem as if it has been 10 difficult years for you. Reading your archives was eye-opening.

Bob said...

Losing a parent is hard. i lost my mom t cancer twelve years ago.
It never gets better, but it does get easier.

Richard said...

It's ok to be sad for a while. Hugs.

Leanna said...

My dad was dying of cancer too but he took his life one week before he was to turn 70. I came home from working the evening shift and I sat down on the front porch with him the night. He told me he was so tired. He OD'd on his medications. It's been 18 years. I still think of him. I'll never forget him ever but I have to move on. As I get older I think of how he was in his final hours. He was just so tired of life.

Michael said...

My dad died way back in 1992. He was 62 years old. He just dropped dead. It was a shock to everyone, but the good thing is that he never suffered. It's okay to be sad. I think the sadness that comes back every so often helps one to grieve.

krayolakris said...

Hugs from me too.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Sixpence, thank you.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Walter, life is life, there will be good and bad days, I'm used to it.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Debra, very true, no time to waste on being sad.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Deedles, good cause I'm all out of your grandma hugs!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

1st Man, send fresh veggies!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Christina, I try not to but my personality can be very sentimental.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Old Lurker, it feels like a long ten years and like a flash of lightning at the same time.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Bob, I was told by my aunt who had lost her husband that you never get over losing someone close... you only get used to it.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Richard, there is enough to be sad about without pulling in more from the past.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Leanna, I stopped remembering him being ill and began again to remember the good times, I'm thankful of that, it's how I want to remember him.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Michael, yes at least he didn't suffer but that's terribly young.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Thanks Krayolakris.

Mistress Maddie said...

I'll be in your same shoes probably, no, I know when my mother eventually I passes. Although the longer in time, I deal better. Now it's my turn to grip hug you.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Maddie, a friend of mine lost his mother recently, it was sudden but since he saw what Dad went through and what is happening to my Mom, he feels lucky that his mother did not suffer.