Friday, April 19, 2019
Out with friend.
Yesterday was a warm day, fffinally! I knew that today would be a holiday so I decided that I wanted to go out to eat last night, knowing I wouldn't have to worry about getting up early. I called James and asked if he wanted to meet up for dinner, he said yes and we met at a restaurant near his place. I feel that I spend too much time communicating with online friends and not enough time with an actual friend. I like James, as I have said, he has his quirks but is a decent man, plus this may be shocking to many of you... I have my own quirks as well. Some people might be put off by his bluntness but I appreciate it, even if he says something that I don't like, I know it's from his factual personality and not from trying to be mean. I like the honesty, it makes me feel comfortable around him.
At the restaurant, I was getting out of my car and saw him walking up with a big smile on his face. He looked.... good? Really good actually and for the first time ever, I felt a stirring towards him. We sat down and conversation was easy with him. I think the constant emailing really helps because we already have that background of knowledge between ourselves.
I was sitting there thinking to myself, I wonder what it would be like to have sex with this man, that we probably will have sex some day, we have discussed it, he understands that we are just friends, again he is very factual about sex, almost comical to most people but it's actually a huge turn on for me because I know he means what he says in practical terms, also refreshing from the stupid things most men have said to me online. James is tall, about six one or two, ooow I like tall guys, again standing in the parking lot I felt a spark while talking to him, he is slender and the good kind of hairy, I like that as well. I had visions of what could happen. I want to meet up a few times and maybe if all is well, we could plan a day trip away together and try out this gay sex thing people keep talking about.
My only negative take away was when he ate, he kind of made a huge mess of himself and it turned me off, as in really off, I couldn't watch him eating. I suddenly felt like I was in an old Ally McBeal episode. If you are not familiar with that show, she might go on a date with a guy and he may seem perfect for her until he would eat and have food on his face. Then in her mind she would see him as having his entire face smeared with salad dressing or something to that effect. I saw people looking at him and a waiter had to rescue him, it annoyed me greatly. I know that is one of my quirks, I don't like attention and I certainly don't want to draw "unwanted" attention. He was embarrassed and I downplayed the moment. Next time I will keep him out of embarrassing situations, it's what I need to do as his friend.
It was getting dark and so I had to go, I felt a little bad about that but later I was thankful as a fog rolled in on my way home like I never saw before. There were times when I was crawling along in the car because I couldn't tell where I was, it was unbelievable. When I got home, James had sent me an email, thanking me for inviting him out and wishing me a good weekend. The normal thing for a friend to do! That's one of the things I admire about him, none of the games that the other guys play, what's wrong with communication between friends!
Have a good weekend everyone!