Saturday, December 1, 2007

Life Assembles

Life assembles sometimes like a puzzle, piece by piece which at first, looks like a mess to the person trying to fit everything together. Until you get that lucky break, that right piece that lets you see the picture that is beginning to form before your eyes. Finally you feel that there is an end in sight.

I have returned from my Christmas party and I did have a blast but it certainly did not turn out like I thought, it had an even stranger twist to it that was unexpected. My friend Lyn came and picked me up, I had it all planned out on how I was going to tell her. I was going to say something like, am I suppose to be her boyfriend at this party, I knew Lyn would be embarrassed and say no. I was then going to say that she was missing the one thing I look for in a date, a penis. Lyn has a few gay male friends so I knew it would be okay with her. I could see doing it and writing it here for a good laugh. However it went more like something I would read in my buddy K's blog I have to admit it. We were on the way there and I asked the question "am I suppose to be your boyfriend" she laughed and liked I planned became embarrassed, Lyn said no she told everyone we were just friends, I was about to set her up for my penis punch line when she added, "um I am not really attracted to any guys, mostly just girls." Huh? Wha? What? Me totally stunned for a few seconds asked if she was joking. She said no, no joke, that she was attracted to women. We did the 'are you kidding', 'no I'm not kidding' routine for a few seconds. She said that she considers herself bisexual, but is mainly attracted to woman. She said that she was finally learning to accept it.

I told her I am behind her and then started to laugh. I said "this is so funny because I was just about to tell you that I am gay" she looked at me shocked and we went back into the "are you kidding me', 'no I'm not kidding you', 'are you serious', 'yes I'm serious" routine. I said this is so awesome! I can't believe what she said next! She told me that she wants to go to a gay bar, but does not want to go alone and then asked me if I would go with her. I almost screamed with joy. I told her that I have been wanting to go for a while now and was looking for someone to go with me. I know of a really nice gay bar that caters to both lesbians and gay men equally, it is quite popular. I am trying to get her to go this evening, woohoo! Now on to the party and more crazy shh.... stuff that I could not believe.

I told Lyn that I wanted to tell her sister, who is also a good friend of mine and would be at the party. She told me that even though her sister is cool with gay people, she was having trouble over the fact that Lyn likes women. I said maybe I won't tell her then. She hit me with this. She said for me not to worry, that her sister thought I was gay, was waiting for me to tell her and did not care. She said the gay guys at the party also do not know she is bisexual, even though they are close friends of Lyn. I said I would stay quiet then so as not to make Lyn feel uncomfortable.

The food was great, conversation was wicked, I had a bit of a buzz, and the gay guys were at their finest. It is what I suspected, that I was uncomfortable around them before, because of what I was trying to hide and of what they represented for me. They were hilarious, the life of the party, really sweet and I think maybe they received the signals I kept sending them. They said they may have a party and wanted me and Lyn to go if they do. I would so go in a second! There were straight couples there I did not know, but I felt comfortable because they were very loving towards the gay couple, both women and the straight men. I wanted to come out to more people but held back because of Lyn as she did not want to talk about it at the party. The final to cap off the night was the conversation between the two straightest guys there. One guy said that the gay couple are great guys and he really liked being friends with them, that they could joke around about anything. The other guy is Lyn's brother in-law and also my friend. I was worried how he would take it if I told him, that is until he was telling us about the gay wedding he went to, where his friend a trucker (who looks like Ben Affleck), married a transvestite. Huh? Wha? What? He went on to say how the trucker and him had been friends for years and everyone deserves to be happy. I kept thinking I must be dreaming, when did I fall into such a gay positive world as this, pinch me. I am too excited to sleep! It gets even better but enough for now.


daveincleveland said...

wow........what a night......good for you steven but dude, you can't leave us hanging.........that is soo cool buddy glad it went well

Bill said...

It is amazing how the world unfolds for us when we come out of our little closets.

Patrick said...

I love stories like this. It sounds like the evening was fun and encouraging in all sorts of ways. I hope you guys go to the bar tonight. Have a great time.

Anonymous said...

I had to laugh when I read the part about you two telling each other....that was great....thanks for sharing. Sounds like you had a wonderful time.

Matt said...

Sounds like a great night for you on many levels. COngratulations!

Wayne said...

So very cool! Things seem to work out for the best!

Doug said...

Omg, Steven, I am so happy for you I have tears in my eyes. Even though I just started reading your blog a couple weeks ago, I know so well the feelings of relief and joy and wanting to shout in sheer exhilaration. This is just so wonderful!

W said...

Sounds like you had a very postivie experience. Nice. Fun.Pleasing to hear.

IT IS WHAT IT IS said...

i love this blog
so smart

K said...

{claps furiously}

I'm so happy for you...I'm kinda giddy actually...haha!

Who would have thought that Lyn would turn out to be bi. Thats crazy....(and very reminiscent LOL!)

Dude...I hope you had a great time at that gay bar...and make sure to let lots of digits!!!

Jess said...

That's terrific! What a wonderful night! I think this may be a turning point. I sure hope so! I hope it makes life easier for you and that you can be more comfortable going forward.

Scott in Iowa said...

Wow. How ironic life can be! This is the point where I told you your gay friend list will begin to grow. Enjoy Steven!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Dave, I know what a crazy and fun night. Thanks for your support Dave.

Bill, it keeps getting stranger. However stranger in a good way.

Patrick, it was very encouraging and there is a sudden window that has opened up.

John, I am kind of upset I did not get to use my penis joke.

Derek, we are still laughing about it.

Matt, thanks buddy and enjoy your snow!

Wayne, they certainly turned out different from what I thought would happen.

Doug, I sometimes get the same way when I read about a blog buddy having something good or bad happen to them. You are right, probably because we go through the same things at one time or another.

Erik, it was good. I hope some things turn around for you, sounds like you are under a bit of stress.

iiwii, welcome and thank you!

K, hey buddy! When I was in the car and she was telling me, I kept thinking to myself, "am I in one of K's posts!" Sounds more like one of your wacky adventures!

Jess, I think this will be a turning point, at least in finding gay friends.

Scott, I sure hope so with the friend list. Ironic is the word for certain!

Steven said...

Wow! A lot unfolded between you and Lyn, all while she was driving. Glad to see that you made it back to blog. Things definitelty seem like they are falling place for you. Good luck with your exposition to the gay bar with Lyn. I hope that provides a positive and rewarding experience for you. You're moving along quite well, my friend!