Thursday, January 3, 2019

Resolutions, dating & other bull.


 I don't do new year resolutions but if I did I think I know exactly which ones to pledge to. I know that I often spend way too much time on line. Out here can be lonely and I often feel like I have stepped into a room full of friends when I get online. In my mind I am connected to society, I'm no longer alone. I don't "think" I am addicted to being on line, I actually "know" that I am addicted, to the point where it interferes with my daily life, to the point of costing me a lot of money. Yesterday was a good example, I wanted to send a simple text to a friend, he is on his way to warmer climates for the winter and I wished him good luck. That was at 9:45 am, before I shut my phone off, I wanted to check out a few blogs and send a couple of emails. After a few minutes, I felt that I was starving, I wondered to myself, "what time is it anyway"? It was 2:05 pm, I couldn't believe my eyes, what did I just do.

  My other thing to get on top of is my eating habits. Not dieting but diet, I used to be really good at watching what I ate. I remember when I got tested about eight years ago, the doctor told me that I had the lowest cholesterol levels he had ever seen in a person, he said to keep doing what I was doing. Unfortunately I didn't, now I would be afraid to see those numbers. As I become more youth challenged and pro couch potato, those are a combination that doesn't mix well.

 I was emailing with a blog buddy yesterday, in my view he has taken on the roll of the older brother I never had, a reflective, sensible and incredibly handsome older brother. I was telling him about how one of my new gay acquaintances, let's call him Adam, (I will say acquaintance because we're not at a friend level yet) started to hint at "something" between us. I kind of joked back but at the same time not a joke. Adam messaged me a really nice message about how he sees me and about us clicking together, then he also said a few really cool and erotic things to me. My blog buddy joked maybe things were looking good for 2019, I was hoping. I messaged back to Adam that I think he is very attractive, a great guy and that I am interested in getting to know him better. He never got back to me, I know he was on line, I know he read my message, I just don't get people these days. If it was reversed I would immediately reply, either yes let's go further or no I'm not ready, interested or whatever but at least I would reply. There is nothing he can do now to repair that mistrust, it shows me that he is clearly not boyfriend material, people are so weird.

13 comments:

Richard said...

It doesn't make sense to me. Online apps allow men to behave poorly, and thus, show their true colors. Keep searching....

Leanna said...

I know how you feel. If someone really is caring and what's to be with you they will stick around and let you know every day that they care about you. Be careful is all I'm saying. This could be a one night stand sorta in the making. You will know when the real guy comes along. It's going to be a loud ZAP in your brain, sorta like a lightning strike.
As for NY resolutions, meh. I can live without them. They are made on the fly and broken the same day or week after they were made.

John Gray said...

Richard is right an early so are u
" slowly slowly catchy monkey"

mistress maddie said...

Ok just pack up and move down here. Two Steve's can be better than one.

And I still dont trust online apps and site. Everybody is just expendable.

I dont do resolutions. Besides, an hour in to the new year, I've already fell off the wagon.

Sixpence Notthewiser said...

Oh, resolutions. So overhyped.
In any case, if you see that you’re spending waaayyyy too much time online, just do what I do: I only blog at certain times 😎.
If you see your cholesterol will be higher than a giraffe’s neck, try the seven minute routine. That’s what I do 😄
As for the guy who does not get back to you, his loss. *shrugs*

XoXo

Old Lurker said...

Yes, you should get your online habits under control. I have struggled with this for decades, and as a result I am more-or-less unemployable. You might use that phone of yours to set a timer.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Good luck with your resolutions!

Old Lurker said...

Also: don't discount Adam as boyfriend material. Just because somebody goes silent on you temporarily does not mean they are ghosting you permanently. They may just need some time to get their thoughts in order. If a good-looking, kind-hearted, employed, moderately-intelligent fellow was to proposition me then I would need some time to collect my thoughts too.

Let him know that "no" is an acceptable answer, and apologise for making things weird, then see what happens.

Deedles said...

You know what? I'm just gonna send you a new supply of hugs. The old granny hugs expired 12-31-18. You are being upgraded to the new and improved Granddeedles hugs. This batch is good for a year no matter how many times you need them. Whoo hoo! Having only dated Balder Half, I don't give advice on the subject. I'm longwinded enough as it is.

anne marie in philly said...

I read blogs at night and on weekends, I don't text. fuck resolutions. do whatcha feel and feel whatcha do!

Bob Slatten said...

I don't do resolutions, unless it's a resolution to not do resolutions, then I'm all over that.
I agree about giving Adam a chance, but don't forget this little snafu; if it was a fluke, no big deal, but if it's a personality trait, you've been put on notice.

Michael said...

As someone who has been ghosted, I know how it feels. On a positive note, perhaps he's super busy and you'll get a text before you know it! (I am trying to be positive!)

Ur-spo said...

I read your entries backwards so I get to know the future :-) before you do

I made 7 resolutions.