Monday, April 28, 2008

Whew!

Movie night went really well, I was so nervous going over there that Dave kept telling me to relax. I pretty much knew it would be okay but sometimes, we have all probably saw where for no reason, people just clash. Fortunately for me this was not the case. Eric and his wife instantly hit it off with Dave. Even at times jokingly ganging up on me and teasing me. Dave and Eric have a lot in common and often it came to a point where I was left out of the conversation, that was perfectly fine with me, actually I was hoping that would happen. Dave is also used to being around small children, likes to joke with them and so the girls thought the world of him.

Eric's wife went out later for the evening and after the girls were put to bed, it was then movie time! It was perfect because we all like the same type of movies. Sitting there I just felt like the usual me, just guys watching a movie together. The only thing that caused me to wonder, was sometimes Dave would try to hold my hand, lean on me or put his hand on my lap. I felt guilty because I would tell him to stop. It became annoying to me. I felt guilt because I am not sure if I did not want him to do that in front of someone because we are gay or if I just did not want him to do that period. If I were straight, I don't think I would want a girl-friend being like that in front of my friends. I know I don't even like to do that in a gay bar, I don't like public affection, I see affection as an intimate thing not to share with others. The thing with Dave is he will do it more if I try to make him stop, I am not sure if it is a way to tease me or his way to make sure I am not rejecting him (more I think teasing, he is a brat like that). Dave will often try to get me to kiss him in the most awkward of times, always with potential exposure, he laughs when I say no, he likes to make me feel shy. I did not also want to make Eric feel uncomfortable as he is so supportive of me and this relationship, I want to be respectful to him. Eric and his wife are very loving but never have put me in an awkward situation, they as well, are affectionate when alone so I want to be respectful back.

The main thing now is we are establishing groups of people who support us as a couple. We are being asked as a couple to dinners, parties and barbecues. It is a good feeling, an unbelievable feeling, not the disaster that I thought coming out would be. I made the remark to Dave that I used to think if I found someone like him, there would be no point in having a gay wedding because no one would come, however now I see there would be a lot of people who would want to come, in fact some people have already said half joking but half serious that they want to be invited to my gay wedding! I don't want to jump ahead, we have only started this relationship but it is comforting to know there are so many people gay and straight behind us. Dave stayed over night with me, as my place is closer to Eric's than his. He had to leave just before noon, we talked about where we are in this relationship, where we want to go, our dreams etc and we can see that they are pretty much the same dreams. I walked him out to his car, told him I had a good weekend with him, to drive safely and that we would talk later. He pulled out and drove off with one final wave and I am a little embarrassed to say this, but as he disappeared from my sight, I had to fight back tears. I thought to myself, I love that guy.

11 comments:

john said...

Sweet!!
And I agree, public display of affection is kinda yucky in my book.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like Dave is quite a guy...Paul likes to joke with me too when out in public....I love how you ended this post....sigh....

Vic Mansfield said...

Oh just go for the kisses! I guess it must be that midwest / Canadian reserve. We Southern boys can be, um, uh, very affectionate. Anywhere.

Teasing? Talk about it. Honestly. A big "thing" for me.

And, it is so sweet. I wish you all the best that is to be.

Justin said...

There were a bunch of first time visitors on Beale that day! It was so much fun! They were like...."What the hell?"

Justin said...

There were a bunch of first time visitors on Beale that day! It was so much fun! They were like...."What the hell?"

Anonymous said...

That's great! Being in love is even MORE fun if you get to show off the cutie!
Am with you on the whole display of public affection. But I do understand Dave a little: he just likes to tease you. Wanna come over here for movie night?

Steve said...

I got the same with public display of affection and I would have the same if I were straight.

Wayne said...

That is just soo sweet!

Paul said...

Movie night with friends ... it's great to see you're having enjoyable times.

Doug said...

I love how far you've come in your relationship with Dave and with yourself.

Bill said...

It is such a relief when your good friends like your boyfriend. It's not something you have any control over, but it sure is great when it works out that way.
I agree with you about being respectful of your friends and their home. If they do not kiss and cuddle in front of you, I would not feel good doing that in front of them. There is a time and place for teasing.
On the other hand, I was hoping at the end of your post when you walked Dave out to his car you were going to lay a big, sloppy French-Canadian kiss on him right there on the street.