Wednesday, February 20, 2019
There you are, you are having a productive day at work when suddenly you get that feeling, yes you have to go potty... and not just the sprinkling potty, the full stinky potty, you have to go poo! Classy right?
I hate, with a number one passion, having to go for a number two at work. I can't hold it, people are going to get wind of what I am up to sooner or later. I slip quietly away and try to make my deposit. However I get very tense and being very tense and trying "to go" are a combination that just doesn't mix. It's hard to relax because I am trying to do something private in a public place. First however, how gross is a men's washroom, I always feel that the place needs a bleach power wash to disinfect the area.
As I place layers of toilet paper down on the seat... and then set them on fire, ok not really, I settle in and try to relax. However without fail some guy will rush in and always pick the stall beside me. There he will sit and then he will start going into labor. He will grunt and groan but worse is the straining noises, like the guy is lifting weights. This totally breaks my concentration and I lose focus. Now I'm too tense... I can't "go" when I am too tense. It's also a game changer when the guy next to you, clearly eats too many spicy foods! I finally go but I am unable to relax enough to go completely, so for the rest of the day I feel like there is a literal, "stick up my butt".
Later in the evening when I get home, I can relax and go. When I am at work, I learned to play with my phone, read a few stories, it makes me forget where I am, just like the old days where some people used to read the news papers while doing their business. Poop'n @ work , it's gross, I hate it.