Thursday, October 19, 2017
The wrong team.
What I am about to say here may offend some but that certainly isn't my intention. This gay thing...... just feels wrong to me. I don't mean being gay is wrong or bad, just for me it doesn't fit. It's like back in school when you were put on a team but all your friends have coincidentally been placed on the other team. I'm the square peg being hammered into the round hole. I just always wanted to be a husband and a dad, have my little house and live happily ever after. It just makes me really sad, this is what I have been given so I have to make the best of it. I was watching a story about a young gay hockey player, about how he came out, the reporter asked how he feels now, he said that he is much happier and then he had this cute grin and a spark in his eyes and said "I like being gay". I guess being a young gay hockey player would give you a lot of good experiences but that statement gave me a chill. At that moment I realized that I hate being gay, I know this may startle you guys but no point in lying, most of you seem to be thinkers so I am just being honest. I don't like being gay, I make due with being gay. Everything about it just makes me feel like I am going against the grain, there is still this hidden stress over it, not like it used to be but it's still there. I sometimes feel that it will cause me to die young. Sorry everyone, I just needed to say it.