Monday, January 13, 2020

That visit went well.. tehehe!

 The weather cleared up last night and so I was able to go see mom today. I decided to make her a treat for her birthday, mom's favourite oatmeal cookies. When I got there she was having a good day, she seemed more aware today. When I told mom that it was her birthday and that I have a card for her, she said, "oh thank you very much". I was surprised, normally this wouldn't register. However as I said, she was really more aware today than usual. For example on Christmas day, she had no grasp or concept of Christmas or Christmas day. No matter how many times I said it was Christmas, it never sank in. I don't think she was fully aware that I was even there with her. After the Christmas dinner, I gave her a gift and she kept wanting to go with a friend, so I just let her wander away from me. Today she seemed to understand what I was saying to her. She was even excited to receive a card. When she tried the cookies, she said, "mmmm are these ever good".

 Then we walk... that's a must, we have to get going, so off she went with her cookie and me trying to catch up. I love this place, they have lots of space for the people to walk, they don't drug them into sitting, they don't try to lock them up. They say, "if she wants to walk around, let her walk around"! She is about five times stronger than she was. As much as I liked the first home, I realize they were not really a good place for mom. They wanted all the elderly people to sit and watch tv all day, that way they could get their other work done.

 Suddenly mom asked, "that was good, do you have anymore"? I said yes that we left the cookies in her room. She asked me how do we get back so she could have another cookie. I took her back. This was huge for me, most days now she is not fully aware that I am standing there, for her to be engaging me in a conversation felt awesome.

 I took some pictures and decided to film her. I asked her a question and what happened next made me laugh and cry a little bit. I asked if she knew how old she was. At first she didn't understand and answered in nonsense. Suddenly you see in the clip, her begin to understand what I'm asking and she begins to converse with me.

Me: It's your birthday, do you know how old you are?
Mom: No... no I don't know how old I am.
Me: You're 81.
Mom: Mine is 81! I'm 81?
Me: Yes your 81, it's your birthday.
Mom: I'm... 81! I'mmm eightyyy one! HOLY mackerel!

 Then she takes her cookie and goes again. This made me laugh but also almost cry because her sense of humour came out. It's why the workers love her, she jokes with them all the time, it makes their work day easier. Most importantly it's on video, I was actually just filming to see the response of a person with dementia but instead I was given a little gift of mom showing up for a few seconds. She was having a good day and I just had one too.


Debra She Who Seeks said...

Little episodes of lucidity like this are a real gift -- enjoy and treasure them! Sounds like she really enjoyed those cookies you made!

Jimmy said...

You both got a gift!

Willym said...

Reading this was a little gift for all of us. Thank you.

Old Lurker said...

I would be lucid for oatmeal cookies too.

Deedles said...

*Sniff*. That was a happy tear :)

Christina said...

Sorry, I'm late to the party. A very happy belated birthday to your mom.
I'm so pleased that you could share a lucid moment with her. That will warm your heart in years to come, I'm sure.

Sixpence Notthewiser said...

Awww so sweet!
So glad you got to give her a gift and that she was 'there' go get it.
A very nice bday present.


JP said...

How very touching. A lovely post.

HuntleyBiGuy said...

Oh Steven! You now have a little treasure that you can look back on forever. Keep it safe. Upload it somewhere so you have an extra copy should something happen to the original.

I’m so glad you were able to share this moment with your mother, especially after how Christmas turned out. Bask in the glow and let it warm your heart in the cold dreary winter.

anne marie in philly said...

steven's magic oatmeal cookies bring out the best in people! happy you had a good visit.

Dave R said...

I'm glad you and your mom had a good day.

Bob said...

What a lovely day you two shared.

"Holy mackerel!"

JanF said...

That's wonderful. You have started my day so well with such a happy story. It certainly was a day to remember and I am really glad that you thought to bake those cookies for her!

Leanna said...

You got a chance to see her true self again. That is a special gift. You should film her every time you visit so you have something of her good or bad when her time is over. It's rare so film these times you visit in order to catch them.

HuntleyBiGuy said...

Wait! Are you saying he puts more than oatmeal & (choose 1 or 2: raisins, chocolate chips, peanut butter chips) in his cookies. Maybe some wacky tobacy?

Michael said...

I am glad that both you and your mom had that day, and that you got to film it. You must get your sense of humor from your mom.