Monday, November 26, 2018
Standing in Her White Dress.
I keep thinking about a memory over and over, a moment in time from my early twenties. My cousin had gotten married earlier that day and of course there was a reception after. He is about two years older than me and I was really happy for him because he had found the sweetest and nicest young woman that you could ever meet. He always had some awkward thing about his personality, friends didn't always take him seriously. Now he would never be alone, someone would always be at his side, I thought we should all be so lucky.
He was the baby in his family, his brothers and sister were older with a small gap between them. The wedding was very emotional I guess because they couldn't believe their baby brother was getting married. I remember my dad joking, "they all keep crying, what do they think she is going to do to him"!
Finally the night came to an end and as we were leaving, we saw that the bride was standing alone in the yard. The best man had gone to get the car and in the excitement the groom went with him before the bride stepped out. My dad pulled up and rolled down the window asking, "oh no, he didn't get nervous, ran off and left you did he"? She laughed and said no that he went to get the car. My father then said that we would wait with her until the groom returned.
I remember her standing there in her snow white wedding dress, a contrast to the dark night, almost like a statement an artist would make with an art piece. A young woman about to start a life together with a young man but on this day she was having a moment she probably often dreamed about as a little girl. She had a big smile on her face, finally the car appeared, we said our goodbyes again and drove off giggling.
Saturday I received a call telling me that she died suddenly from a heart attack, everyone is shocked. She leaves behind three kids and her husband (my cousin). Life makes no sense at times but if there is one thing I have learned, it's better not to try and make sense out of something senseless. We were not close, over the years cousins with their own families drift in different directions and so I had not seen much of them lately. Time slips by so fast, it feels like only a few years ago that they were married, it's shocking to me that she is gone, I can't help thinking of her, standing alone in the yard, her white dress glowing in the darkness.