Friday, February 3, 2017

Clouds are Breaking.

For a while now I have found myself surrounded by sadness, there comes a point where it takes over. I guess I have reached a point in my life where most things seem to be an ending of some sort. People and places important to me no longer exist and it's all because of time passing. Luckily I have a good neighbour, she looks out for me, she constantly says "remember this too shall pass" whenever a disaster appears to be heading towards me. I didn't want to be one of those bloggers who's posts give you that constant feeling of a rain cloud showering over your head as you read it, so I stayed quiet. No point in complaining, its just life, there is nothing I can do about most things that are weighing on me. One day there comes a time when you have to accept the fact that when a door closes, it stays closed, there is no window, there isn't always a happy ending. ....................................... The fog is lifting for me, the clouds are breaking, I am tired of feeling sad, the days are getting longer, spring is coming. I was telling my neighbour I need to make changes now, this house no longer feels like home, more like a museum to Mom and Dad. Every drawer, cupboard, box or door I open sends me back to some memory of years ago but now it feels more like opening a wound because after the rush of happiness, comes the reality that I am alone now. This I think most people would agree is probably not that healthy. I am bracing myself to begin to say goodbye to everything that was a part of my life journey, but I'm ready now... almost... sort of.... I think.

7 comments:

Willym said...

Steven
There is a great gap here that perhaps needs a bit of filling. It's been so long.

Ur-spo said...

I stop by regularly hoping you will post. I was glad to see you doing so; I was saddened to hear you feel so down and dejected. I've had several (6? 7?) times in my life where I felt like this. Yes, things do pass. I hope something marvelous awaits you out of these ashes.

Anonymous said...

I started following your blog this summer, and I have missed your postings. I know what you mean about not wanting to post anything that is considered a downer, but remember, writing is a form of therapy. I have had a bunch of bad things happen to me in the last couple of years, and many times I never included them in my blog. But when I did write, it truly was (and is) therapeutic. I hope the clouds continue to dissipate. Thanks for writing.

larrymuffin said...

I agree with you that it is healthy to clean house and do away with the past, it is never a good thing to live in the past. Life is for the present and future. We had to clean my parents apartment and yes it was hard, so many memories, afterwards we all felt better, relieved. The good memories stay in our head and our heart not in material things.
Hope for the best for you. Yes Spring is coming only 5 more weeks.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Thanks for the feedback gentlemen and thanks for sticking around. I will probably fill in more later but right now I don't feel like going over old news.

Anonymous said...

Glad to see you back. I've missed you.
JP

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Awww now you're making me blush!