Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Ouch

Sometimes words can really sting, I know that I am suppose to ignore statements made out of ignorance however we all know that is easier said than done. This past weekend my parents and I were talking about a politician that they do not like, my mom made the following statement "he is so crooked, remember when he tried to get his homosexual son off", I said that his son was not a homosexual, his son was a rapists, she answered back "homosexual or rapists, whats the difference". Ouch Mom, I have to say it is partly age that makes her say this, she was not like that years ago, now she is at the age where everything and everyone is wrong, crooked or out to get people. Still however when I am suddenly slapped with something like that, I can't help wonder how they will view me if I told them.

11 comments:

r. said...

Ouch is right! But parents are parents. If you had your chance explaining and they still don't listen or care, what can you do?!? Can't change them, change yourself.

Patrick said...

Wow, I'd feel slapped by that statement too. Sorry you had that experience, Steven. For what it's worth, if you do end up coming out to your parents at some point, I bet the memory of that (and any similar statements she might have made) will cause your mom quite a few sleepless nights. I'm not wishing that on her, I'm just predicting it.

Anonymous said...

As one who is hearing these "ouch" comments all the time....I know it's hard.....parents are set in their ways that I know forsure. If you should tell her I hope it gets better.

Stephen Chapman said...

Wow, that IS a cutting comment. I'm not sure how I would react to that - I'd probably have to say something to air my view. However, sometimes its best to let it go and move on...

http://thestateofthenationuk.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

A tough spot to be in and 'Ouch' for sure. Isn't it funny (not) the things we say when we don't know any better.

Birdie said...

Wow, that had to sting. Maybe you can tell her you know some "homosexuals" and they're pretty nice. It might make her think twice, and it could pave the way for you.

When people in conversation make cracks about gays or AIDS, I'm quick to gently point out that they're out of line. I won't let them dig themselves in too deep, and I tell them about my brother. Maybe next time they're tempted to make a remark, they'll remember and keep it to themselves.

john said...

Wow, what a statement...I'm not sure if I could have sat still for such a comment. I only seem to find bravery when I'm defending someone else and not myself.

Joe Jubinville said...

That had to smart. I wonder if she sniffs something in the wind about you and Dave and was trying to provoke a response.

I came out to my folks in my teens. My dad, to my surprise, came all the way around. My mother, though accepting of me personally, still held some religious reservations. I accepted that, but I never felt really close to her again.

Doug said...

My adrenalin would have been pumping. It's attitudes like that that get all the anti-gay marriage amendments passed.

Stephen said...

"I can't help wonder how they will view me if I told them" I know exactly have you feel. This statement runs through my mind almost daily and it doesn't make it any easier knowing how those you care about think and feel. You have made tremendous steps in coming out so be proud of those, the others will come in time.

Anonymous said...

I hope that sting has diappeared. And I know that it not only hurts because of the statement made, but WHO actually made the statement can hurt as well.

I guess the next time she says that you can ask, "Are you calling me a rapist?!?!?" Then that can be her (non-physical) "slap in the face."