Thursday, September 13, 2007

Creep, not the song.

Reading through other blogs, I see where people have been put into uncomfortable situations or someone tried to drag them out. Even though coming out has been going well so far, I did have someone try to drag me out at work and it was not meant in a positive way either. I used to work closely with a small group of five people. One of the guys in the group I greatly dislike. He is a loose cannon and you can never trust him, he has also been in affairs with married women and could care less about the families that he harms. He took notice that I never seemed to date or mention women and he started to make comments to me, hinting that he knew I was gay. If he had of been someone that I trusted, I probably would have been ready to tell the truth but not to him. I considered him to be a socially dangerous person in and out of work. One day I had to show him a new procedure so he pulled his chair over beside me to learn. While I was showing the procedures, he looked around and then put his hand on my knee and said "you like that". I just laughed and thinking nothing of it, an attempt at a bad joke, brushed it off. He looked around again and put his hand back but higher up on my leg, he said "feels nice uh, I know you want it", I was still thinking this had to be a joke and brushed his hand off. He put it back only this time even higher. He was staring at me and he said "its OK, I won't tell anybody, I know you are", I hit his hand off and told him to just pay attention to what we were doing. This time he placed his hand high enough on my thigh that he was covering my car keys and said, "don't be like that, you live alone, we could go back to your place, no one would know, there is nothing wrong with it, I know you want to". By now I was really creeped out and said out loud to embarrass him "no, I don't want to and you better back off"!

Bringing attention to what he was doing seemed to stop him in his tracks, he quit after I said that out loud. The strange thing is that I am still not sure if that was an attempt to trick me into coming out to him or if he was trying to sample the grass on the other side of the fence. His personality could make it go either way, he is sexual enough that I would not be surprised if he wanted to try it with a guy. He could never go more than twenty minutes without making a sexual comment and they were always very vulgar, it never bothered him who was around, whether there were women, company guests, etc. It could have also been the other, in that he has a very cruel sense of humour and he would have taken great delight in outing me to everyone at work, it would have given him a feeling of power over me. Of all the people at my place of work, he would have been the last one that I would ever have thought of telling. I realized I had let my guard down around this person and from now on if I had to work close with him it would be "straight shields up Captain" to try and throw him off. I hate to think what would have happened if I went through this two years ago, I think I would have been really thrown off. I was starting to think of telling people when this happened so I was in a better state of mind and could cope. I figured if I kept it quiet it would look like I was hiding something so I told my coworkers. They agreed with me, they were not sure if he was joking or if he was really coming on to me, he is just that sort of a strange person, no one can tell with him. He insisted to them that he was only joking and never tried it again. If he was only joking, then what was his plan if I had of said yes! I would never go with a married man anyway since I am respectful of any relationship but I could not help think, of all the guys that I work with, I was hit on by the one guy that I can't stand!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

That was sexual harassment. If it had been a joke, he would have stopped when you brushed his hand away the second time.