Writing my last post I had an uneasy feeling about it, I worried about coming off as judgemental. Honestly I know I was being judgemental but it is not in the way most would understand. I know that there are gay men who just want to have a 'buddy' or 'buddies' to help them get through life and I think that is your life so do what you feel is right for you. I even understand the attraction to it, for myself right now it is not something I want but I don't think I'm better than them because I do see the erotic excitement to exploring with different people.
My problem is with the guys who pretend 'no strings' sex is not what they are after. I respect a guy that says this is what I am about and is at least honest about it. However I am uncomfortable if a guy thinks 100% about himself and how he can 'use' other people for his satisfaction only. I also have a huge problem with a guy being dishonest and deceitful in trying to get someone into his bed, that is just wrong, creepy and shallow. I can't see not caring at all about the person you are with at such an intimate moment. I also wonder about guys that just become an open door to any stranger, why are they treating their body like a trash can, I feel there is probably an underlying problem. I wish they would stop, not because I look down on them but because I care about people and if there is a problem I want them to heal inside, plus remain healthy mind and body.
I can be a dirty boy, I am not all sweet and innocent. I'm with Dave now but if I was single and one of my friends wanted me to stay the night, depending who it was, I might. Even if I chickened out, the thought is there. In fantasy world, Steve is a bad boy, I can't tell you how many times I wished I had a 'gay spray', just one squirt and any guy will sleep with you, but not because the spray made him, only because he always wanted to and the spray lets him relax enough. Many times I have been stranded on an island only to discover a troop of hot marines have been there for months and ask if I can help them out (cliche I know) and of course I do. There have been times riding home on a bus where a cute guy gets on and all I can think of is I wish I could just ask the guy to come home with me and he would consider it an honour and say "sure I'll come home with you, then you can give me a bath and we will take it from there", if only! In the 'real' world, I never really spoke about this but just before I met Dave, I had met a guy who for the most part was straight and dated women, he was honest about it but said there was a part of him that liked to spend time with a guy. He was really cute and wanted to be friends, we hung out a bit and he seemed a decent normal guy, nothing happened between us plus I met Dave around the same time so I figured it best to cut ties with the first guy and go for a serious relationship with Dave because that is what I wanted. I'm just trying to be honest and say if I had not met Dave, I probably would have started a 'buddy' relationship with him, maybe not who can say but the potential was there.
My point is I understand there is a much larger flow in how gay people relate to each other than in the straight world, relationship wise and sexually that is. What is enough for me may not be enough for you and that is not my business, I don't have a problem. I just hope however you live your life you are not hurting gay family members because the rest of the world does enough of that to us already.