Friday, June 20, 2008

Circle of Friends.

Today, emailing back and forth to one of my blog buddies, made me call up a feeling or belief I have and I wonder if others ever feel the same way. Do you ever feel that certain people were meant to be in your life, that no matter what, God, life or what ever you believe in, will keep circling people back through your life until they become part of your life. Have you ever been in awe as to how you met some of your friends, boyfriend, girlfriend? Do you have a strange story as to how a person became a close friend or maybe you moved to a strange city only to bump into your favourite cousin and learn they just moved down the street from you?

Past examples for myself would be, in my younger days I was extremely shy, so meeting people I found to be very hard. Often I would feel that a certain person at work or in another social setting should be a close friend of mine, almost as if we had met before but I found it too hard to go up and get to know them. Usually it would happen that we would meet later on another job or we would find out that we had mutual friends while bumping into each other at a party or wedding. People that I wanted to try being friends with would be cycled back through my life until we had the opportunity to really get to know one another. Other times I would lose contact with past friends that I was close to, just from the day to day stuff that happens as we get older. Work, school, family will take away people and we lose contact before we realize it, however suddenly I will be walking through a park close to where I live, only to bump into past close friends who have moved back to the city and often just down the street from me. I have learned now as I get older to hang onto good friendships, no matter where they move to, good friendships are worth more than gold as we move through life, and whether we like it or not, one day we may find we need them. Sometimes I would like to believe that it is no accident in how we met the really important people in our life. Cycling, circling over and over, perhaps it is more common for me in a small city but I have heard very interesting things from people in large cities, even over seas as well. A cousin of mine had a new family recently move in across the street, when he went to welcome them, it was one of my close friends from past school days, thus giving us an opportunity to reconnect.

Finally even for Dave and myself, our meeting was clear chance. I was trying out a new site to meet guys, it was not going well and after only two days I pulled the ad because of the creepy responses I received. Dave also had tried the same site long ago and having no luck either, he gave up. One day being bored, he thought he would take a look, saw an ad for this poor little lost gay newbie and thought "this poor guy needs a friend or the gay world will eat him" so he responded and offered me his friendship just before I pulled the ad. I was nothing that he would have looked for in a boyfriend, we did not seem to have anything in common. I never would have responded to his ad either, I am chicken of sport-bikes (motorcycles) and I do not know much about home construction/renovations plus some of his other interests. I would also have been intimidated by him being already out to most people and would think a relationship could not work since I was only coming out. I did need a gay friend however and here I am now, that friendship only lasted until we first actually met in person, it was instant between us, we were too scared to admit it but a few days later I made my move and the rest is history as they say. The also remarkable thing to this is that the night we met in person was just a sudden spur of the moment, Dave was to have a meeting and since it was canceled he wanted to go out, I was close by and available so I went to meet him but only for friendship. That following weekend was when we sealed the dating deal, however he was actually suppose to go out on a first date with another guy the next week, so things could have turned out very different! Again however, sometimes I feel that people move through our life until they are exactly where they were meant to be.


A Lewis said...

Thanks for visiting my site today. And, yes, I do believe that circles become complete sometimes....after many, many years. I don't believe that it always happens...but definitely sometime.

Peter said...

You were one of the lucky ones to whom it happened.

I know only about you from the blog, started reading it just before Dave came into your life. The insecurities, finding your own place in the universe, your own man, it just had to be so.

And as a matter of fact, it's a small world after all...

JOHANNES said...

It is a wonderful thing that has occurred in your life.

My soulmates came very early, but then I was sexually active as a gay boy very early.

Since those very heady days in my teens thru my forties, since have relaxed somewhat when it comes to a soulmate relationship.

But I found my soulmates when I NEEDED them and for that I feel blessed. They were all by accident, :) if you believe in accidents.

Love ya,

r. said...

No matter how determined we are in life, it doesn't always turn out the way we project.... that's why your story on how you and Dave met is even more special! :-) Take great care of one another!

Enjoy your Sunday!