Night Driving.

 This evening I was driving home late from work. It was after nine and the roads were empty. I saw the most beautiful scene, the moon was shining so brightly off the fresh, new fallen snow. It was so bright that I didn't need to use the highbeams on my headlights, you could see everything, everywhere. I often heard the description of a silver glow to the snow on such nights like this, that description would fit perfectly tonight. It was post card beautiful, all the sleepy towns settling down for the night, the homes, churches, barns, trees and log fences trimmed with white snow and icicles. I could see deer scattered throughout the night fields, pawing up something to eat. Only the brightest stars could be seen in the crystal clear sky. It was beautiful and there was no way to capture it with a camera or phone that would do it justice, I did the best thing that I could do, I enjoyed the moment. Nature can be so breathtaking.

No Winter Allowed!

 We.... sadly are in the grip of winter already, this is not normal for us, usually in November we have fall-ish temperatures and lots of rain,  with a few flurries until up to Christmas. However we had more snow in one day already than we usually get in all of November. I and many others were caught off guard, we need to mentally prepare for this. Tonight it is going down close to -30 Celsius with wind chill, in Fahrenheit that's eeeeeeek! It's enough to freeze the testicles off of everyone.. including women! It has snowed almost every day since Halloween, with these cold days, that snow is going nowhere.

 How did this happen, go away winter, you arrived too early. Since winter sticks around until April, it's almost overwhelming to think six more months of this garbage.

TV, Gay Wedding Moment.

 Last week I enjoyed a tv moment, I don't have much choice when it comes to television way out here in the country, many nights I only get one channel. I was watching an episode of "How to get away with murder". I started watching because of Viola Davis, she could do a dog food commercial and I would want to see how it ends. To be honest I think the show is a little evil and not in the cool kind of evil but as in actually corrupt. Anyway two gay characters got married in last week's episode. I was thinking that I have watched gay couples marry on tv before but not a couple that I have followed along with for years. It made it extra special.

 I could step into the characters and get a glimpse of what it must be like to get married in front of family and friends to someone you love. I was enjoying the moment and taking in the fact that I was watching something on tv that when young, I could never have even dreamed would be part of the regular tv hour. To add to the romance, one of the characters sang a song to his new husband, I was not aware he could sing so well. I admit that I clapped when they said "I do" and kissed, I love seeing "my people" being represented on the small screen.

 Of course the show had to ruin the moment by having some of the main characters murder someone, which they often do. I don't want to go down that road in this post, I want to focus on the positive side regarding the wedding. Also speaking of ruining something, this post crashed and I lost everything I wanted to say, so now you are getting the rushed from memory version.

 I love that romantic mush, this princess still dreams that a prince will come to swoop me off my feet and take me away to make our vows. At least I got to daydream about it, a glimpse into the possibility.

The Penetrating Words of Kindness.

 Often when something negative happens, I can become too focused on the moment. I try not to do that but I'm human, I have a hard time letting things go, it doesn't help to have my very own negative peanut gallery in the back of my mind. Those little nagging voices that try to convince me that I'm a total buffoon in everything I do and say. Fortunately as I get older I can command, "quiet" to the voices.

 I need to focus on the positive and recently I have had some really kinds words spoken to me that caught me off guard in a good way. I often drive a coworker home, a young Sikh man, he moved here from India and has no family in Canada. I can imagine how lonely that would be and sometimes I feel like an older cousin that has to look out for him. He is really easy to talk to, we joke and laugh all the way to his place, many times we also have deep discussions as well. I am glad that he is starting to come out of his shell at work, I wanted other people to see what a kind, decent plus comical guy he really is. One night we were laughing at the pranks a mutual friend pulls on us at work, then he said, "I like talking with you and Mark, you guys don't make me feel like I'm different from everyone else, I feel like we're the same". I had a total "awww" moment, I said "you are the same to me, I don't see you any different". He went on to say that some people can't get past the fact that he wears a turban.

 A few days ago one of my uncles came to visit, we were never close but I think he is getting sentimental as he ages. He is my father's younger brother and likes to come visit at least once a year to see the place and bring back old childhood memories, more so now knowing that one day I will sell the farm. He was asking about mom and then suddenly looked at me and said, "your dad would be so proud of you for the way you are looking out for your mom, really proud of you". I didn't know what to say, I was caught off guard, my family never says things like this. To be honest I always feel like I'm not doing enough and that I could do better. I think I needed to hear those words, not because I want praise for a job that I should be doing but because they help me get through the hard times.

 This weekend someone said something sweet that was just off the cuff but spoke volumes. The other night I was asked by someone to come for supper, when I went over I joked about him not clearing it with his wife first and just showing up for supper with a neighbour in tow. She laughed and said, "it's not the same when it's you showing up, you're not just a neighbour, you're like family".

 I had a few other really kind words said to me in the last weeks, I guess I'm not a total jerk, maybe some people even like me (lol). I try to say positive things to other people, maybe life is giving back with interest.

Mosvember?

 I know it's movember, a month where guys are not shaving mostly to grow a mustache and start a conversation regarding men's health. Although most of the guys at work are sporting the mustache but still don't want to talk about men's health, it's a guy thing.

 However here I think is movember, as in a mosquito in November! The other day I was attacked in the bathroom by a giant man eating mosquito. I sure hope that is the last mosquito of the year, at -13 Celsius outside I would think so. With complete disdain for the little creature I cheerfully said, "hello little mosquito, allow me to introduce you to your own ass" and then I promptly squashed it into the wall. One of the memories from summer 2018 that I can do without.

 I just hope this is not the beginning of a climate change type of winter mosquito...  a snosquito! O.O

 Skeeder meet butt! :D

Ahh! It's here! It's EVERYWHERE!

 Oh no, I was doing a little shopping this evening and I suddenly realized what was happening, it was all around me, the horror, THE HORROR! Yes since it's the twelfth, the stores started playing Christmas music. This will happen every single time I go to buy something for the next six plus weeks.

 Just to be clear, I don't have a problem with Christmas music, I'm not religious but it's part of my heritage and it brings back a lot of happy memories. My problem is that it's just too early, that's so wrong, we shouldn't be hearing Christmas music when many of us haven't finished raking up the fall leaves. Also the stores don't give a rat's behind about Christmas, peace on earth or good will towards your fellow man. They are only interested in sales, I know that's how they make a living but they don't have to behave like they are Christmas's pimp.

 I get up in the dark, I go to work in the dark, I come home in the dark, it's making my mood dark. Today I tried getting up extra early in the hopes that I could make it back home while the sun was still up, I wasn't able to. I am going to put the lights up outside soon, our ancestors were smart, many cultures have a festival of lights around this time of year, clearly it was an early way of warding off depression caused from lack of sunshine. My Sikh and Hindu friends are celebrating Diwali, they invited me to go but I was too shy, maybe next time. I think it's no coincidence that Christmas involves candles, colourful lights and stars, I had stopped putting up lights and decorations years ago but one year I felt overwhelmed by the darkness and also loneliness, I decided to cheer myself up and a little sparkle did wonders. I was thinking of having a little tree lighting ceremony at the farm, just an excuse for people to get together, have a hot chocolate, some snacks and talk.

 However I'm still not happy about already hearing jingle bells while I'm try to buy socks and underwear.

We will never learn.

 Today is remembrance day in Canada, a day to honor those living and no longer living who died fighting for our country. Good people who died too soon and those who's lives were forever changed.

 I am not one of those people who watches all the documentaries on the wars and I don't go to the memorials, not because I don't care, it's because I find the waste of young lives overwhelming. It's enraging to me that some leaders somewhere, at all points in time, make imbecilic decisions and send ordinary people to their deaths. Ordinary people are my people and no matter what country, race or religion they come from, they don't want to have to leave their store, factory, farm or fishing boats to go off and end up in trenches being shot at.

 Today is no different, I feel hopeless for the future of humanity, all our latest technology or advances is wholeheartedly embraced by those wishing to use it for war but rebuffed when it comes to using it to better society. Things like advances in medicine, sustainable living and education is viewed as some sort of witchcraft.

 Today however is not a day for me to rant about the tragedy of war, today is a day to remember the ordinary people who made the greatest sacrifices so that I get to live in a country that is not under the rule of some paranoid dictator. I may not go to the memorials but I will not forget you either, thank you for your service.