Hold out your hand.

 I was cleaning out some of my mother's things, as her illness progresses there are many things she no longer needs. Like her clothes for evenings out on special occasions such as a wedding or dinner party. Also her watches or jewelry, they make her become obsessed with playing or hiding them, only to lose the object within minutes. My mom was not one to wear much jewelry, she never had her ears pierced until her forties. Jewelry was for special occasions mostly and a little for work as well.

 My dad certainly never wore anything other than his wedding ring and a watch in the line of jewelry, sometimes cufflinks. He did have a farm watch, a church watch and a special occasion watch. I wanted to be like my dad so I never really had any interest in jewelry. It would not have been odd for me to wear something, many of my friends wore a small gold chain, some bought rings. French Canadian men love jewelry, they often had their ears pierced, two chains and two or three rings.

 I also felt I wanted to keep things natural, if I was supposed to have things sticking out of me, the universe would have given me horns. Yesterday I picked up a gold chain out of a box, that I think probably had a locket on it at one time. I put it on and I liked the look, it needed to be a little more masculine but I could see myself wearing a guy's chain, I may buy one. I did think for a time in my twenties about an ear ring but decided against it when some of my friends tried it and I didn't like the look. One piece of jewelry that I never wanted to buy was a ring, I have tried some nice gold ones on and they looked nice. The reason I wouldn't buy one is because I always wanted my first ring to be given to me by my boyfriend.

 I know it's not the usual reason one gay man gets excited when a second gay man gets down on his knees but that was always something I had hoped for. I wrote about this before but the feeling would be overwhelming to see the man I love have this goofy nervous grin, kneeling before me, open box in hand, asking me the question and when I say yes, I hear "hold out your hand". Like the feeling of defeat when I finally accept that my mom no longer needs her jewelry or clothes for an evening out, I also realize that the romantic proposal is probably never going to happen.

Playing hard to get.

 Last night I was very frustrated with trying to meet guys. I never mentioned this to anyone because I didn't want to build on something that never happened but I was supposed to meet with a guy on Friday. Again it was a no go. At least this time the guy let me know he wasn't coming. However it was at the last minute, after I spent the afternoon getting ready, I was dressed and heading out to my car when I got the text. Yesterday I was getting disappointed with fake profiles when suddenly a younger guy in his thirties sent me a message.

Guy: Hello there. :)

Me: Hello back, lol.

At this point I was thinking to myself "please don't be an idiot because I have had my fill".

Guy: I'm so horny!

I just let out an "uuugh" because it was another idiot. There was a million things I wanted to say to him and all were what an idiot he was. That wouldn't be fair to someone just looking for sex, although my profile says I'm not interested in hooking up.

Me: Really? Seriously? Then for Pete's sake maybe you should go take a cold shower or something!

I figured that would be it, he either would stop or tell me off. Anyway I got a huge kick out of myself and was laughing at what I just said. Then he emails back.

Guy: Then maybe after you could warm me up!

Me: Ahh, I bet you say that to all the boys.

I guess he was surprised by resistance, he probably was used to either getting interest or turned down.

Guy: I really like red heads, they are cute.

Me: yes apparently I have become the latest fashion trend, we are all the rage now.

Guy: Lol.

I suddenly could see there was some personality there. I shut him down politely, I told him that I never just hookup with a stranger, that I am not comfortable with that. He emailed back and said not to worry that he understood, which I thought was polite, unlike the usual silence I would normally get, so they are not all jerks.

The Great D..k Pic Debate!

 The other day I made a comment to a fellow blogger, (a super sexy older guy) about not responding to guys with pictures of their... umm.... their ummm... their breakfast sausage, their member, one eyed snake, junk, their penis on their personal profile. Some guys don't have a face picture and yet have a picture of "that"! I feel it tells me something about them. Maybe I am using an outdated form of judgment. I personally don't feel a really quality man would do that. I can see later on as you get to know each other and are joking around, maybe one dares the other, that's different. Just putting it up as part of the advertising seems really odd to me, I can't see that man as being a decent guy.

 I totally understand if you are searching for a hookup, actually it probably makes sense to do that, the signal is pretty clear and the other person knows what they are getting, they are not hooking up for your vibrant personality. I am not judging anyone if that is what they are into. I have also heard stories of guys hooking up and going on to forming a relationship.

 The other blogger said that I shouldn't look at it that way, the guys could just be confident in themselves and with how the equipment looks. It does seem to be common, maybe some guys don't really want to do it but feel they have to. However when I think of all the guys I would love to date, most I know would never post such a picture. Maybe I am wrong, maybe I am right, what do you think, if you are or were single and were trying to date, would you ignore a person trying to contact you who posted pictures of his hotdog, garden hose, rooster, tent pole, penis, his penis. Apparently it's not just a gay thing either, some of my female friends tell me the same thing.

Coasting Downhill. Hurtling?

 It's becoming clearer to me with each passing day that I am getting o___, becoming youth challenged. My friends and I joke about it all the time now, the signs are there, actually the signs of aging are held in the hands of angry anti-youth protesters that show up and force you to act your age. Where is a good water cannon when you need one!

 I know that I'm getting older because....

 I like rhubarb now, I used to hate it with a passion.

 I find most people too loud, it's like they think they are in a play and are performing for me. I don't care how you told off the person at work.

 I think most new t.v.shows are stupid.

 I prefer a good cup of tea over any type of pop or soft drink.

 Even though I enjoy swimming, I rarely go because most pools and lakes feel like ice water to me now.

  Most new music is garbage to me, although to be honest I was never a top forty type of person.

 I sometimes hurt my back just by getting out of bed the wrong way the morning.

 I find sci-fi movies ridiculous, when at one time they were my favorite.

 I don't like cake anymore and just threw some out a neighbour gave to me.

 My "down time" is a nap.

 Sex takes a lot longer to reach the final goal, okay I'm not complaining about that one, I'm bragging!

 I have my current cell phone for five years and I still don't remember the number.

 My stomach closes up shop and goes home around seven in the evening.

 New clothes are like a stranger in my personal space, while old favorites are like my family.

 Any weird or odd aches and pains, make me worry about a tumor or heart disease.

 New gadgets no longer excite me, they annoy me. I think it's a conspiracy to make you buy the latest version of everything.

 I sometimes feel there is a conspiracy behind most things, it's the government! Kids these days! When I was young! There was a time! I'm having toast for supper. I need a nap.

Make it great again.

July fourth, make America great again, work towards getting rid of the lump. I feel bad that so many of my friends to the south don't feel good about their country. However there is nothing wrong with the "country", America has contributed a lot to the world over time, even though you rarely hear about those stories. There are a lot of really fantastic people and also good people that have been lead astray and just need to be reminded they are decent.

 Americans just need to work on taking their country back from whatever ideology that seems to have taken control of it. Don't be ashamed of your country, only be ashamed if you do nothing about it.

How hot is it?

 It's so hot out that my deodorant has put an overtime claim in. It's so hot out that if I walk around barefoot, I'm hydroplaning across the floor from sweat. It's so hot out that if my "boys" drop any lower, I going to have to tuck them into a sock to keep from stepping on them.

 Yesterday was brutal, I like the heat but I don't like the humidity. It felt like a wet towel was tied over my face, very hard to breath. Makes your feet feel like they are fifty pounds each! Today is a little better. I was out early this morning to open up all the doors of the barn, it stayed cool in there until the evening, I don't want the animals to get over heated. Even with all the windows in the house open last night, the temperature inside was still above 80... whew! Still hot today but so far less humidity. I was also in the garden early this morning before the sun came up. I didn't do anything for Canada day yesterday. A friend of mine was in this morning, he said that he went to the local town hall and no one was there. Most things had been cancelled until later that evening so I didn't miss anything.

  Today is a holiday in Canada since Canada day fell on a Sunday. I was invited to spend the day at a lake today.... so see ya!!!

Canada day and room elephants.

 Today is Canada day, I can't tell you how many times I've been watching the news and feel privileged to live in this country. Yes we have our flaws but they pale in comparison to most other countries.

 I would like to talk about the fun things we were supposed to be doing but there is a giant elephant in the room..... again. I don't go to the city anymore because I don't like crowds. I like the smaller towns, I find them more fun. However events are being cancelled left right and center because of the weather... again. This time it's an extreme heat "event" like never seen before. The temperature will soar to 36 Celsius or 97 Fahrenheit, now I know that may not sound so bad to people in the warmer climates but it will come with a suffocating humidity, the results will cause it to be more like 47 Celsius or 116 Fahrenheit. Absolutely unheard of for this part of the country. The humidity at that level doesn't allow the body of people or animals to cool down from sweating because the air doesn't absorb our moisture anymore. Already at six in the morning I can barely breath outside.

 Many Canada day events have been affected by weather in the past. I get so tired of people saying, "this is normal" no it isn't, maybe for a jungle somewhere but not Ottawa Canada. We do actually get high temperatures in summer and many humid days but not like this! Last week it went down to almost freezing again, we had a lite frost but lucky for us, no plants were damaged, that also never happened before this late in June, look over here, pay no attention to that climate change behind the curtain.