Tuesday, May 22, 2018

The Hordes Arrive!

 Lock up your children, bring in your pets, close your windows, seal your doors, the hordes are arriving. This spring came very late for us, it has been unusually cold, one bonus to this is that there have been no bugs. When I say bugs I don't mean ants or cute little lady bugs, I mean blood sucking, nerve fraying, ear buzzing little bastards call black flies and mosquitoes. Last year was epic with all the rain, there were clouds of them and they lasted well into fall.

 It has been surreal this year, I can be working out in my garden and there is a feeling like something is missing, that's when I realise that normally I would be doing the mosquito dance. Slap your knee, swat your head, whack your shoulder, squish them dead! Now everyone spin around and start over. However this year had been great, unfortunately I procrastinate. Last night I could hear one lonely little mosquito trying to get in, nice try buddy but it's not happening. I thought I better get the outside looking better faster, one means the others will come soon. This morning I was reading blogs near an open window and could hear two of the little buggers trying to get in, I thought uh oh they will start soon.

After a warm day today, the gates to bug hell swung open and clouds of the evil little s..uckers descended onto the farm. The cats are looking at me, "oh hey no, there's no way we are going outside"! There is this constant whirring droning sound like an electric motor about to die. My window screen is brown with mosquitoes trying to get in and have a piece of this sweet sweet Canadian sugar (lol). I should have moved faster to get my yard work done, now where is that bug spray?

24 comments:

Michael said...

When the cold finally dissipates, and one can enjoy the great out of doors, the bugs come. I remember growing up in upstate NY when spring finally arrived, the black flies came too. They would crawl around your ears and buzz around your head. Then when they left, the mosquitos came. No fair!

Anonymous said...

I've never heard of black flies. Living in a high plains desert limits the amount of mosquitos. I don't miss them.

Deedles said...

Our camping season is upon us. We have at least three places we go to every year. They all have lakes or ponds or water just sitting there looking watery. Mosquito breeding grounds I tell ya! Also meat wasps and those tiny things that seem to fly as an annoying cloud. Gnats, probably. Do any of them go after hubby and the dogs (nice name for a doo wop group)? Nope! They zero in on me every single frickin' time! I don't hear them and I don't feel them bite, but I go home with massive, itchy red bumps every time. Bug repellent attracts them to me. I love camping too much to stay at home though.

Mistress Maddie said...

Here, the bugs have not been bad at all yet. But they usually aren't. And like Deedles, I go camping several weekend up in the Pocono's , my friends site sit not far from the little lake. But the bugs there aren't even bad. I have seen a fair share of bees at the pool there, but nothing bad. I have even laid back on the dock and never even got bit....where bugs hang out...but nothing. Maybe it's all the gin?

Mike said...

When I read the hordes were coming, I thought of our beach tourists. This weekend is the beginning of the tourist season. Traffic will be awful, stores crowded. Our little pests will be disappointed in the weather -- cool and wet -- they'll have to think of other ways of working on their melanoma!

Christina said...

Hello there
I've been lurking for a few months but never commented before.

A totally selfish question, I know but we are visiting Hamilton to visit my grandfather's grave who was a Canadian war veteran ww1 in September this year.
Will we need insect repellent? Any other tips you can offer us?
Thank you in advance.

I really love your blog. You are so honest and real.
Regards, Christina.

John Going Gently said...

I once was stung on the testicals by a wasp

Deedles said...

@John Gray- OUCH!!! I don't even own a pair and I had to cross my legs in empathy or sympathy (I always get those two confused). I'm not even going to ask how the wasp got there.

Mike said...

John, Deedles: now I *have* to ask. Someone has to do it.

Mistress Maddie said...

@ John....Is that why the right one is so much bigger?

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Michael, yup that pretty much sums it up! I am sure the bugs miss you and would be happy to see you again!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

RJ, oh wow are you ever missing out on a treat. Black flies are about the size of a grain of rice, they come in packs or flocks or demon spawn invasion waves. They land with determination like you can't believe, crawling up your nose, in your ears, down your shirt. You actually don't often feel them bite, but unlike a mosquito with its needle, these guys bite to make you bleed. They make a mess. Some people are allergic to the bite and it looks even worse. They hatch in running water and not stagnant pools like mosquitoes. Our only saviour is the black dragonflies that come in June. The horror! The horror!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Deedles, you smell delicious! Maybe I should keep you here until June... lol!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Maddie, well if that is where you camp nude, never mind the bugs, beware of squirrels!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Mike, now now be nice, the stores need the business. I am allergic to tourists as well lol.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Christina, that's wonderful paying your respect to your grandfather. I am happy to say that you should be safe in September, the bugs will most likely be gone by then. September is usually a nice month, you probably want to bring light jackets or sweaters with you.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

John were you in Scotland? I'm thinking kilt? Were you at Maddie's nude camping ground? Had you just met someone and we're trying to impress them by making things look bigger? All joking aside I hope you don't have allergies to bees.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Deedles, it's ok... I went there! This is a perfect time to explain the differences to you. So since I have a pair of testicles, I know what it would feel like, so I can emphasize with John, I have empathy for him. You don't know what it would feel like to have your balls stung but you feel sorry for John so you have sympathy for him. Tomorrow I will explain laughing "at" someone and laughing "with" someone.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Mike, got you covered! Seriously did John forget about me being a smart arse!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Why Mistress do tell!?! How do we know these things? Poor John, ok everyone stop picking on my buddy!

Deedles said...

Thank you for the language lesson, I do so look forward to more in the future (except for that spelling with the extraneous "u" thing). As for my smelling delicious, that may be so, I may also be sticky (don't ask) but I refuse to be anybody's flypaper!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Deedles, ok not a huuman fly sticky paper sheet, I hear youu louud and clear buut now I want youu to wear a t-shirt that says "I'm delicious" or if youu come to Canada "I'm deliciouus"... lauugh ouut louud!

Deedles said...

HA! Oh, youu! I juust love youu to pieces!

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Deedles :)