Morning call! Someone's dead!

 Snorzzz, snorzzz, snort, snort, snorzzz, snort, fart, snorzzz  -.-  snnnor RING!!! RING!!! O.O The phone is ringing!

 Jump out of bed, find light switch! What's wrong? Must be mom, maybe heart attack! Maybe my sister's partner, maybe something happened to my sister! Maybe a fire somewhere, someone needs help! Must get to phone, must get to phone! HELLO.. HELLO???

 What? What? I'm numb from what I hear! Numb from the white hot rage that builds in me when I realize that not only is it a telemarketer at this time of the morning, it's an automated telemarketer at that! What the hhhheck!

 I'm hoping this isn't going to become a trend, the phones here are close to sixty years old, there is no way to unplug them or turn them off, they are wired directly to the lines. I would have to call in the phone techs and that would be expen$ive.

 I can't believe the nerve of those companies, yet it must work or they wouldn't do that. I haven't had any calls for weeks now. About a month ago I received the call again from the psychic department of Montreal. I should have spoken to them to find out what it's about but unless they produce some winning lottery numbers for me, I'm not interested.

Speaking of people dying, I bumped into a young woman the other day, her mother was in the original home with my mother, her mom has a genetic disease that kills off parts of the brain, many in her family had it. I asked the daughter how was her mom, she said not well, that she was rapidly losing weight. She then said, "I wish it would be over soon, I know people think I'm horrible for saying that but I hate seeing her like that". I told her people can never understand that feeling until they are in the same situation. They don't know what it's like to watch a loved one suffer, they have no clue what it takes to reach the point, where you realize that the person is better off dead... and that wanting to keep them alive becomes selfish at that point. They have no right to judge because many of those thoughtless idiots would be sobbing messes if it was happening to them.

 She sighed a sigh of relief, she knew I understood, actually I could see it on her face that she was relieved that someone understood her. I was thinking she is not even thirty years old yet and already having to deal with so much... because to add to her tragedy, when they found out about her mother, her father was fighting cancer and died of a heart attack.

 Yesterday I heard that the mother died, at least she is not suffering but I can be sad over the fact that this woman was not even sixty yet. I'm sad for the daughter and I hope she doesn't feel any guilt over what she said to me. I actually feel a little envious because now she can fully grieve and then move on with life, whereas my sister and I are still trapped in the longest goodbye as they say.

 That's why I was thinking about the phone call this morning, maybe some day that could happen, maybe I would hear, "we're sorry to tell you Steven but your mother passed away last night". It would be conflicting because it would be sad... not sad.