Thursday, September 12, 2019

I turn heads.


 As the title says, I turn heads. I was never that great looking but I noticed when around the gays, many guys would wink at me, smile at me, come talk to me and it felt good. Even when I was with Dan, I often got hit on with him there. I was a little ticked about that but he seemed to get a kick out of it. Sometimes I think he enjoyed it, sort of an attitude of, "you want him but I got him".

 I turn heads for a different reason now and it's something I have to learn to accept. I'm reminded of a comment some man made on John Grey's blog (Going Gently). The comment went something like, "I started to notice when I reach my fifties that heads no longer turned for me, no long glances, no once over, no one sees me anymore". That made me feel sad because I know it's inevitable.

 I'm losing my super powers, one of my abilities was to look years younger than I actually was. On my fortieth birthday, I was the only person asked for I.D at the bar we went to. That felt hysterically funny and good at the same time. The bouncer leaned into my face and said, "oh sorry sir, I didn't see all the wrinkles around your eyes", thanks for the great story to tell, b..ch.

 I was turning heads at the pride festival. Often while walking, I would see a guy take notice of me, he would start to check me out but suddenly as he would get closer, he would do a look of realization, that I'm older than he first thought and then he would look away. I've been too embarrassed to bring it up here but yes, I turn heads, only now they are turning their heads away in disappointment. I think that might be worse than not being noticed at all.

14 comments:

JanF said...

I think that your last comment is universally true. Inside don't we all feel as though we look at our best, perhaps at age 25-30.

Old Lurker said...

If you posted a few pix here (maybe sporting those sexy new glasses of yours?) I am sure you would turn a few heads.

John Going Gently said...

Yes the older one gets the more invisible you become

Sixpence Notthewiser said...

I think I know what you mean. Sometimes gay men tend to look younger than straight men but we DO get older. I, like you, look younger than I actually am and have been carded once or twice at a bar. It is a gas.
But we have to accept that gay culture is obsessed with youth and fitness (and don’t get me started on the masc 4 masc) and that’s a fact. There are men who prefer their men over forty *raises hand* but there’s no consensus there. I think that if a man prefers younger men, he’s shooting himself on the foot cause the clock does not stop and he’ll keep getting older while the men he likes keep getting younger.


XoXo

@Lurkie: you crack me UP!

Bob said...

I don't know ... maybe it's that, as we get older,we don't instinctively put ourselves out there as much, so we don't get noticed?

When you're younger, you're out there looking and putting out a 'look at me'vibe, but as we get older, maybe we settle more into ourselves and don't send out the 'look at me' scent.

Richard said...

I'm sure you're still turning heads for the right reason. Perhaps they turned away because they were intimidated or thought you were straight. As I got older I started attracting a much younger demographic. However at 62, I don't want a guy in his 20's.

Mistress Maddie said...

Well from the few times I have seen you, you have turned my head and I would hit on you...and I have good taste, so there, that's all that matters cutie pie.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

JanF, absolutely true, I have to stop and think when someone asks me my age, I want to say 35 or something along those lines.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Lurker, you first! :D

Sooo-this-is-me said...

John, you are supposed to cheer me up, not clobber me with reality! Lol

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Sixpence, I didn't get the sense that it was age discrimination, it's just that I am now older than most of the men at the pride events. I don't expect a thirty year old to be attracted to me. I like guys my age and older, I don't really pay attention to younger guys because I want someone closer to my age but I wouldn't turn one away. I did go on a few coffee dates with someone much younger than myself. You are right however, there is a fixation with youth but those guys are often shallow so next!

Don't encourage the lurker.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Bob, next pride I'm wearing my leather harnesses and assless chaps then, maybe that will do it. :D

No I don't have those things.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Richard, yes I blinded them with my beauty, see there is a reason I like you so much!!! Lol
I am not really interested in someone much younger either, I want someone I have a lot more in common with.

Sooo-this-is-me said...

Maddie, awwww gee whiz, you are a sweetie, and same here, I would handcuff you and spread maple syrup on you and... oh did I just type that..