Saturday, December 22, 2018
Stick your green Christmas!
It's snowing here again thankfully, you may be surprised that I said thankfully but the last few days turned warm and yesterday it rained all day. By the evening the ground was getting pretty bare. The weather forecasts were calling for a green Christmas, around here that actually means a brown muddy Christmas or dull gray Christmas, there is usually nothing green about it. Even Christmas lights lose their magic when all the cords are exposed and have no snow or frost to glisten off of. Considering we had snow for Halloween and it pretty much has stayed since then, I was ticked! Yesterday I was saying, "oh no you didn't mother nature, you didn't just melt all the Christmas snow after dumping it on us for two months! Luckily Santa caught this and used some of his Christmas magic to make it a white Christmas again.
It's nice when people decorate for the holidays and I try not to judge but part of me just can't help it, I hear that little voice saying, "what are they thinking"! Here are my personal picks.
1) A couple near me are landscapers and they do a nice job, however one of their Christmas trees is decorated with all orange lights, like a giant pumpkin-Christmas tree genetic experiment gone wrong. The colour clashes with all the surrounding trees, like a beautiful model with a large pimple on their forehead.
2) Another couple near me put up some of those giant inflatable lawn ornaments, I guess they were so pleased that they added a few more. The problem is that they put them up weeks ago and now they no longer work properly. It looks like Santa, Frosty and friends are all are suffering from food poisoning and are staggering out from a horrible Christmas party.
3) Speaking of lawn ornaments, one house with a very small lawn, has put so many Christmas statues and ornaments up that you could mistake it for a garage sale. There is a life size nativity scene, Santa with his sleigh and reindeer, plus every Christmas or winter character you could think of. The stories I think are starting to meld together, I mean as far as I know, I don't remember Frosty the snowman traveling with the three wise men to bring gifts!
4) Neighbors of mine didn't want to potentially harm any of their trees so they wrapped lights around an old telephone pole that is no longer in use. A rotten old pole with pretty lights wrapped around it still looks like a rotten old pole.
5) Finally the classic bachelor move, nail a bunch of lights to the edge of your roof never to bother with them ever again, leave them on most of the year, let the colors fade and never ever change the burned out ones.
But I'm not judging! :)
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16 comments:
Giant inflatable lawn ornaments. Their in good company then, The White House also has them out. It's Trump and member of his cabinet.
#4, That's what I told Balder Half that time he wrapped a ribbon around his old pole for an anniversary gift! Small world, hunh? There is a guy here who decorates his house very lavishly every year and then charges admission. As if! Being married to a deputy fire marshal, all I see is an electrical fire just waiting to happen.
"he wrapped a ribbon around his old pole for an anniversary gift!" - I am shocked, SHOCKED I tell you!
I fucking HATE those inflatables. there is a home I pass on the way to work - their front lawn looks like a container off the boat from china just puked up its contents. every damn thing/figure/creature you can imagine and more.
even worse are the freaks that put up the "jeebus first" signs. spare me; jeebus and santa are myths.
And yet, in January, when all the garish lights and inflatables get taken down, I miss them. Everything's so dark and dreary then.
Maybe it's just me,but the inflatable decorations always seem kinda lazy to me. I'd like to see some effort put into it!
What? You requested snow? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE???
Around these parts inflatable lawn ornaments and common and quite large. Given all the cacti and prickly things you would think they would not be poplar.
Maddie, I heard you know who.... is very tacky regarding decorations even in their house.
Deedles, I was wondering which brat was going to make an obscene pole joke, congratulations on beating Maddie, Anne Marie or Old Lurker! Hahaha!
Anne Marie, inflatables uuugh, I'm giving everyone darts for Christmas! You know what to do... lol.
Debra, me to but I don't miss the sloppy ones or tacky ones! :)
Bob, I feel the exact same way, they are popular with the Wal-Mart crowd. It feels like laziness that inspires someone to fill upa balloon and stick it on their lawn.
Old Lurker, I wanted a frigging white Christmas for Pete's sake! Lol
Dr Spo, I have decided to create a life size nativity scene using inflatables from an adult store, I was surprised that they even had lots of inflatable sheep on hand!
Steven, what did I say?! "Obscene pole" is in the mind of the beholder *rolls eyes innocently* Wow, I beat the best with my pole!
I think Deedles beat the best with Balder Half's pole, actually.
I bet you won't be appreciating that White Christmas so much come February. You don't invite a vampire into your house for Halloween and you don't invite S N O W into your town for Xmas.
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