Yesterday I had to go into the city for tax related purposes, it didn't take too long and soon I was on my way home again. I happened to pass by an arena that reminded me of my friend Eric, the straight guy that I first came out to. We had gone shopping together nearby and it made me think about him. I have been thinking a lot about him lately and I often meant to call him. We had actually been getting close, probably as close to another guy as I ever got. The friendship became even stronger after I came out to him, because now I had a male friend who knew the whole me and still wanted to be friends. Everything changed when I started dating, there was less time for him unfortunately, then dad got sick, then I moved away, then mom got sick, then life happened.
I tried to keep in touch but eventually we drifted and to be honest, it was mostly my fault. I really missed the guy, sometimes I don't know what was wrong with me, why I let that friendship go. As I was driving home I was about to pass the highway that leads to his town, when that little voice in the back of my mind said, "let's go visit Eric"! It was after two in the afternoon so I wouldn't be interrupting lunch and if he had guests I could just keep on driving.
Things looked different, it's probably been nine
years since I was at his place. I recognized the landscape of all things. I knocked and his wife answered. He was so glad to see me, he hasn't changed much, a little grey up top. I joked that I was hoping he was bald and fat so that I could tease him. He is one of those friends that you may not see for a while but you just click so well with, that it feels like last week since you saw each other. We exchanged new stories to get caught up, we laughed at old stories, we get each other's humour or should I say "lack" of humour. I didn't want to impose too much since I had just dropped in unannounced but he kept asking me to stay a little longer. He was actually a little excited to see me I think. When we were finally saying our last goodbyes, I said "I kinda miss you" and he said, "well don't stay away so long"! That's what I like about being gay, I can say I miss you or I love you and people don't panic, I guess they feel there might be a hidden agenda if a straight guy says it.
Step one, reach out to an old friend, step two, after positive result don't be a dumbass and lose it again, step three, hang on like a mouse trap! It's a little strange but I am starting to think some people actually like me.
My List
About Me
- Sooo-this-is-me
- Ontario, Canada
- Lived most of my life hidden in the closet and suddenly realized, it's just not working! I started the process of coming out (way back in 2006) and wanted to write about it, hoping to meet people. My blog has shifted a bit now, sometimes gay issues, sometimes every day issues.
16 comments:
This is so cool! Good for you! I like you too, just from your comments elsewhere. You do need to work on removing that extra (and totally unnecessary) u in some of your words, though *snicker*. Hold on to friends who like you for who you are. They are the best!
Recently I have been reminded just how supportive old friends are ! X
I am of the mind that you can't have too many friends...and those you have you should cherish. The older you get, the harder it is to connect with someone else. I'm glad you rekindled your friendship with Eric.
Good for you to go and see your old friend. I can imagine that you are indeed a really good friend to have.
Bravo ! Good for you! I hope this time it sticks.
When will you next visit?
Maybe people like you? Imagine that! The irritating voice in your head that claims otherwise just might be full of compost. Lots of people like you. Get out there and talk to some of them.
Sometime spur of the moment visits are the best.
I'm sure many people like you. I think you're being modest. I have friends who I don't see very often who now live in other cities. When we visit we can pick up right where we left off. I think that's the mark of a good friendship. Please stay in touch with your fried.
Deedles, awwwe, I like you too, you're funny. I know you are right regarding friends, I am about to reclaim some that drifted away, some friends just can't be replaced.
As for our extra u, it's like this, we have too many of them so we have to add them in every where just to get rid of them. Americans have to use them all the time for U.S., United States, Utah so they ran out of u's. We on the other hand use a lot of a's in our names and that's why we spell "a" as eh.
John, yes it's like that old saying, when things happen, you find out who your real friends are.
Walter, I agree because as we get older we lose the two generations above us and suddenly we are alone, so the more friends we have, the less alone we feel.
Michael54, yes I am really glad I did that. I try to be a good friend, I have my faults.
Dr Spo, I am going to actively work on it this time.
Mr Lurker, there will be a next time, that visit was to open the door again. I agree, there is also a little voice that is full of compost in there, what a perfectly witty description!
Maddie, yes especially for this guy, I knew it would be ok. It was a great visit!
RJ, most of us have friends that are like that, we meet and immediately pick up where we left off, those are the best kind of friends. I am going to work on keeping them close.
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