Wednesday, February 24, 2016
My Buddy, Still.
So after the intense drama of stomping on someone's heart and have them break down sobbing in front of me, I decided to stay in touch and check up on him. I contacted my friend to make sure he was alright. I went over to talk things out, he was ticked off with me and I understand that. He gave me a little heck but eventually we ended up laughing about the situation, he is still hurt but understands, it's nothing personal. We both agreed that we would remain friends, not a lot of gay people around and we need each other. I warned him to guard his feelings, not to get carried away again if we are to continue hanging out. ....................................... We are so different from one another, from different worlds and yet there is a chemistry between us, it scares me at times how quickly he has figured me out. He can read me like a book and will often say "oh boy, what's wrong now" when I have something on my mind. He knows this and will say, "I know you buddy, I've got you figured out". ............................................. I don't feel an attraction to him but also I can already see the problems that would break us up if we were dating. Yes I am an over thinker. I am also a person grounded in reality and to be honest, the last relationship I was in crushed me when it ended. I don't want to get hurt like that again, I know it will probably happen but I would like to avoid that if I could. I am romantic at heart but the reality part kicks in when it's clear that a certain relationship would never work. Oh man, that's coming out so wrong, I am sounding like one of those awful romance made for tv movies. The one where the guy says he was hurt and will never let love in again until one day he meets the neighbor who he hates at first but then blah blah blah, you know what happens. ............................................ I know, actually we both know it's probably better if I stay away but we're both tired of being alone. We both have friends but sometimes we want a gay friend, just to talk about all the things we don't feel comfortable mentioning to our straight friends. Living within minutes of each other makes that friendship work, so we're going to continue and take things as they come. I like just hanging out with him, for example the other night, it was just fun to drink beer and watch clips on YouTube of Mrs Brown's boys while nearly pissing ourselves laughing, something everyone needs from time to time.